How to have a simple funeral
'Just put me in a cardboard coffin and call it a day'
Many of us have heard this from our parents or grandparents when talk turns to end of life and dying. The idea is simple and tidy, but many families find it's hard to ensure this reality for their kith and kin when the time comes.
This short and concise guide will help you find out just how to have a simple but wonderful send-off.
But first, let's bust a couple of myths.
Myth #1: Cardboard Caskets and coffins are expensive
This simply isn't the case. Fortunately the cardboard casket is becoming more widely available in Australia, as funeral providers realise there is a real demand, and also a quality product available.
To be clear, not all cardboard caskets are made equal. We have tried them all, and the only one we use and recommend is the Daisybox Cardboard casket. This casket doesn't need an extra base added, is rated to 240kg (although realistically it only fits a person up to 190cm and around 120kg). We like it so much, we offer it as a free inclusion on all our offerings.
If a funeral provider tries to charge you an exorbitant amount for cardboard, or tells you they can't source or stock them, that suggests they have an agenda around making a premium off the sale of the caskets and coffins they do stock. Don't be afraid to ask questions, and clearly state your preferences. There are plenty of funeral directors out there who now supply Daisybox caskets.
A Cardboard casket with native florals
Myth #2: You can go straight from the hospital or nursing home to the crematorium
As much as we wish this were the case, the fact is it is near impossible to achieve this with the current system and bureaucracy.
When someone dies and is set to be cremated, a whole bunch of paperwork needs to be completed, including a second doctor needing to sign off on the person's death before the cremation can be authorised. That takes a day at best and more often a couple dpending on how fast the original doctor is at signing the medical cause of death paperwork.
Then there are the logistics. Hospitals simply don't want coffins being brought into their facilities, and their mortuaries aren't equipped for people to be encoffined in a dignified way there. Hence, a person really needs to be brought into a funeral home (or taken home) in order for those things to be arranged and the person encoffined properly.
How to have a simple funeral
To be clear, the simplest way is to not have an actual funeral at all, but rather to have direct cremation and then a memorial service and wake somewhere that suits the person.
Direct cremation is the most affordable way to arrange a person's disposition, and not having a funeral with a person's body present will save you thousands of dollars. This is because a full funeral requiures hearse transport, extra staff, and more logistics, and in many cases people may decide to choose a more fancy coffin (although it is perfectly fine to have a funeral with a cardboard casket - people love to sign it).
Many folks say they don't want a funeral or gathering at all, but here is a little bit of food for thought. The truth of it is that
**Funerals are what we do for the dead for the sake of the living'
Thomas Lynch**--
A pine coffin is also perfect for signing
You might decide that you don't want or need a ceremony or service, but many people don't know what to do with their grief, and culturally we have so few ways to attend to the grieving. Gathering together is the best way we have to get some comfort and some closure.
This doesn't mean you need a big fancy funeral, not at all. To be honest you can just have a cremation and then all gather down the pub for a knees-up, if that's what suits everyone best. There are no rules with this stuff.
Here are a couple of ideas for people wanting to have a way to say goodbye, but to also keep it simple.
An intimate vigil followed by direct cremation
Sometimes you really need to sit with your person. Whether the coffin lid is shut, or whether you choose a viewing, for many people, it is really important to have that knowing of the physical presence of the coffin.
We offer a wonderful vigil space for gatherings of up to 30 people. You can bring in food and drinks, hell you can go next door and get a martini if you like, and we can put on a playlist of tunes your person loved.
You have 2 hours to just sit with each other, to cry and laugh and reminisce. To say goodbye. You can even choose to stay the night in our guest suite, so you can get some rest and also have time to really sink into your farewell.
This is a wonderful way to not have a 'funeral' but to say goodbye.
Sometimes, at the end of the two hours, you might choose to carry your person out to the hearse, and wave goodbye as they go off for cremation. Totally up to you
Our Vigil space is super versatile and awesome
A direct cremation followed by a memorial and wake at a self-catered venue
Some people combine a vigil with this option, but many choose to just wait until the cremation has happened, and then have a ceremony and wake somewhere everyone can gather together.
We are the experts in arranging these kinds of ceremonies and wakes all in one. We view the wake as an integral part of the ceremony, and we don’t just bail on you once the ceremony is complete. If you choose a self-catered venue, we’ll be on hand to roll out the food, we can order the booze from uncle Dan’s and the softies at Woolies, pick it up, chill it and serve it. We make it all beautiful and smooth, and are on hand to hand out tissues, drinks and dispense hugs as required.
To make it even more affordable, some families choose a potluck affair where everyone brings a plate. We have seen some phenomenal spreads when people do it like this. Absolutely stellar.
We're able to offer a full service of planning and unrolling the ceremony and wake, but you can also just do it all yourself if you have it in you.
A grazing table feeds far more than a per head catering Menu
Ash-scattering and a knees up l
Just like it says on the box. Sometimes people have us a long to create a little ceremony before everyone heads off for lunch or stays for a barbie, but you can also just do it all yourself.
And that's it! The Last Hurrah Funerals guide to a simple funeral!
